Olympic Opening Ceremonies

The idealogy of the Olympic Games is something that we as a society and as a globe need to take heed of. It was touching to see 80 nations walk into Tourino last night each being proud of their heritage yet at the same time being proud of being a part of something bigger than themselves.

To me the most touching part of the ceremony was when Peter Gabriel sang John Lennon's Imagine and the cameras panned to the athletes who were holding each other and swaying to the music. Not one countries athletes holding to their team mates swaying to the music but ALL of the athletes from ALL of the countries, big and small, swaying as one. It was a moving statment of what life on this earth could be!

No Sex Since '55

A crusty old Sergeant Major found himself at a gala event, hosted by a liberal arts college. There was no shortage of extremely young, idealistic ladies in attendance, one of whom approached the Sergeant Major for conversation.

She said, "Excuse me, Sergeant Major, but you seem to be a very serious man. Is something bothering you?"

"Negative, ma'am," the Sergeant Major said, "Just serious by nature."

The young lady looked at his awards and decorations and said, "It looks like you have seen a lot of action."

The Sergeant Major's short reply was, "Yes, ma'am, a lot of action."

The young lady, tiring of trying to start up a conversation, said,
"You know, you should lighten up a little. Relax and enjoy yourself."

The Sergeant Major just stared at her in his serious manner.

Finally the young lady said, "You know, I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but when is the last time you had sex?"

The Sergeant Major looked at her and replied, "1955."

She said, "Well, there you are. You really need to chill out and quit taking everything so seriously! I mean, no sex since 1955! Isn't that a little extreme?"

The Sergeant Major, glancing at his watch, said in his matter-of-fact voice, "You think so? It's only 2230 now."

DON'T YOU LOVE THAT MILITARY TIME!!