Thought for the Day: I Am Thankful

Happy Thanksgiving

I AM THANKFUL: FOR THE WIFE

WHO SAYS IT'S HOT DOGS TONIGHT,

BECAUSE SHE IS HOME WITH ME, AND NOT OUT WITH SOMEONE ELSE.

FOR THE HUSBAND

WHO IS ON THE SOFA BEING A COUCH POTATO,

BECAUSE HE IS HOME WITH ME AND NOT OUT AT THE BARS.

FOR THE TEENAGER

WHO IS COMPLAINING ABOUT DOING DISHES

BECAUSE IT MEANS SHE IS AT HOME, NOT ON THE STREETS.

FOR THE TAXES I PAY

BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM EMPLOYED.

FOR THE MESS TO CLEAN AFTER A PARTY

BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE BEEN SURROUNDED BY FRIENDS.

FOR THE CLOTHES THAT FIT A LITTLE TOO SNUG

BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE ENOUGH TO EAT.

FOR MY SHADOW THAT WATCHES ME WORK

BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM OUT IN THE SUNSHINE

FOR A LAWN THAT NEEDS MOWING,

WINDOWS THAT NEED CLEANING,

AND GUTTERS THAT NEED FIXING

BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE A HOME

FOR ALL THE COMPLAINING I HEAR ABOUT THE GOVERNMENT

BECAUSE IT MEANS WE HAVE FREEDOM OF SPEECH. ...

FOR THE PARKING SPOT I FIND AT THE FAR END OF THE PARKING LOT

BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM CAPABLE OF WALKING AND I HAVE BEEN BLESSED WITH TRANSPORTATION.

FOR MY HUGE HEATING BILL

BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM WARM.

FOR THE PILE OF LAUNDRY AND IRONING

BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE CLOTHES TO WEAR.

FOR WEARINESS AND ACHING MUSCLES AT THE END OF THE DAY

BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE BEEN CAPABLE OF WORKING HARD.

FOR THE ALARM THAT GOES OFF IN THE EARLY MORNING HOURS

BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM ALIVE.

AND I AM THANKFUL FOR THE crazy people I work with

BECAUSE they make work interesting and fun!

AND FINALLY, FOR TOO MUCH E-MAIL

BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE FRIENDS WHO ARE THINKING OF ME.

SEND THIS TO SOMEONE YOU CARE ABOUT.

I JUST DID.

Live well, Laugh often, and Love with all of your heart!

Jokes: Top 10 things you can only say at Thanksgiving!

10. Talk about a huge breast!

9. Tying the legs together keeps the inside moist.

8. If I don't undo my pants, I'll burst!

7. That's one terrific spread!

6. It's a little dry, do you still want to eat it?

5. Just wait your turn, you'll get some!

4. Don't play with your meat.

3. I didn't expect everyone to come at once!

2. How long will it take after you stick it in?

and the Number #1 thing you can only say on Thanksgiving....

1. I'm in the mood for a little dark meat

Thought for the Day: From one Pumpkin to Another

A woman was asked by a co-worker, 'What is it like to be a member of Alcoholics Anonymous?' The co-worker replied, 'It is like being a pumpkin.'God picks you from the patch, brings you in, and washes all the dirt off of you. Then He cuts off the top and scoops out all the yucky stuff. He removes the seeds of doubt, hate, and greed. Then He carves you a new smiling face and puts His light inside of you to shine for all the world to see.'

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